Seemingly Unending Winter

OK.  I’ve had enough. 

I like to think of myself as a hardy Minnesotan but this is getting ridiculous.  I just got my car stuck in a drift and had to jack it up to get the snow out from under it (which shows the brilliance of attempting to drive a Prius through that drift).  My hands haven’t felt that cold all winter long.  The past few weeks have brought more snow that I’ve seen in years.  Huge mounds line the roads and parking lots.  It’s been all I can do to keep my driveway open.  For the first time I gave up on clearing it from edge to edge.  It just got too deep and heavy.  Snow days keep piling up.  At this rate the school year will never end, and if we miss one more day of school our Community Bible School will happen while school is in session!  If I didn’t know better I’d think it was the middle of January.  Winter just won’t give up.  It’s miserable out there!

I look at the calendar and see that today is the first day of spring.  Finally!  It’s time for new life to pop up all around us.  Here at Peace we planted all sorts of bulbs and perennials late last fall.  I’m excited to see what they look like when they come up!   Easter is a couple weeks away, and that means outdoor Easter Egg Hunts! 

My brain says spring but when I step outside my body disagrees!  Right now, my body is winning.  It’s nasty out there.  I’m beginning to doubt that spring will ever come.

Yet in the midst of this bitter cold, hints of spring have emerged.  The sun feels a bit warmer (when the wind isn’t blowing in my face) and it melts some of the snow off the asphalt.  The days have grown longer.  Birds have slowly come back to the area (though they’ve been hiding in warm spots lately).  These come as mere glimpses of spring, but they point to what is to come.  Winter can’t last forever.  It never has before…and it won’t do it again.  We’re not in C.S. Lewis’ Narnia where it was always winter (and never Christmas).

Spring is coming!  It may not show up exactly when I want it, but no amount of snow and cold will prevent its arrival.

There are times when life can feel as bleak as a bitter winter day.  It can seem like the dark times will never end.  Watching Shannon fight cancer for going on a decade now has been tough.  She’s a trooper, but some of the treatments have been quite miserable.   There is always anxiety about the future.  Some days the cares and pressures of the world seem too much.  They don’t seem to end.

I read my Bible and see that hope has arrived.   Every week I proclaim the God who has come among us in Jesus to conquer death and bring life forever.  I proclaim the God who refuses to abandon us, no matter where we go or what we do.  God keeps calling us back to Himself.

My brain and my mouth say hope, but sometimes my life disagrees.  That hope seems completely irrational. 

Yet in the midst of dark days hints of God’s spring emerge.  God works through someone bringing a meal to help us out.  I see the exciting things that God is doing at Peace.  I feel moments of comfort and peace.  A friend calls to see how I am doing.  These may come as mere glimpses of God at work among us, but they point to what is to come.  Winter can’t last forever.  New life is coming!

God comes!  I may not sense it exactly when I want it, but no amount of struggle and frustration can prevent God from working in this world.

In the church year things will soon look bleak.  This Sunday we complete Jesus’ journey to Jerusalem…and the cross.  Death will win as Jesus cries out in agony on the cross.  It will seem pretty dark and hopeless.

The cross is not the end of the story…the empty tomb is!  Easter is coming!  New life!  Death defeated forever!  Hope for all God’s people!

In the midst of dark days, we cling to that hope with our whole being.

 

 

 

Two Different Kinds of Teams...and Churches

Back in the day my Atlantic (Iowa) High School basketball team excelled, coming within a whisker of going to State.  After a highly successful year we lost a nail biter to the #1 team in the state, Council Bluffs St. Albert (the eventual state champion).   That loss ended my official basketball career.   While I never starred on my team, over the years I put in the hard work necessary to earn playing time. 

Back in those days we didn’t really have elementary sports, so 7^th grade basketball brought at least 25 guys onto the team.   The weeding out process began right away.  Some of the ‘lower end’ players had the joy of playing on the ‘halftime highlights’ team.  While the rest of us took a break and talked to the coach, these guys got to play a ‘game’ that meant nothing to the final score.  The message wasn’t so subtle, “You’re not good enough to be in the REAL game.”  I got stuck in halftime highlights once, but worked my tail off to improve and get off it!  It never happened again.

After that 7^th grade year I somehow found myself chosen to be a part of the ‘traveling team’ which went to tournaments all over Iowa.  A couple dads coached the team and had total control over who they chose.  Only 10 of the 25 were on it.   With that team I spent many hours honing my skills and winning tournaments.  

It came as little surprise over the next years that those of us who played the most off-season games and shot the most baskets got the most playing time during the season.  Many people saw the writing on the wall and dropped out of the program.  Others had to be bluntly told, “You’re not going to play on this team.”  By the time our senior year rolled around only a few of us remained.   Our success reflected our dedication to the sport.  We didn’t need a big team…we needed the dedicated people on the team.  It nearly got us to state!  Success mattered!

Back in the day my Atlantic (Iowa) High School cross country team had a little success.  Our varsity boys tended to finish in the middle of the pack…but I never ran with the varsity.  I spent my junior and senior years on the JV squad (as part of the off season training for Mr. Blazek, my basketball coach).  Even though I’d never been in a race before, the cross country team welcomed me with open arms.  Anyone crazy enough to run 3.1 miles could join the team, no experience (or training) necessary.  While some of my teammates spent the summer running countless miles, I did almost no running at all (unless there was a cute girl who wanted to run with me!).   I showed up to the first practices of the year completely out of shape, but people encouraged me as I huffed and puffed my way through practices.   When race day came I usually finished somewhere in the back half of the JV race.  I had no illusions of grandeur but I really enjoyed being a part of the team.  We had a load of fun…the team abounded in quirky people!  Cross country teams have room for many.  There isn’t limited playing time since any number can run in JV races, so the more the merrier!  Mr. Henderson and my teammates encouraged me to be on the team and do my best, even though my best was frankly pretty bad.  All were welcome…no experience necessary.

Two very different ideas of what it means to be a team!  One team had high demands and weeded out those not willing to put in the time.  One team had low demands and welcomed everyone.  They each have their place.

I’ve known churches on both ends of the same spectrum.

Like my basketball team, some churches place high demands on their members.   They emphasize the Jesus who asked people to ‘take up their cross and follow Him.’  Jesus is serious about us…so we should be serious about Jesus.  They hold up the marks of discipleship (things like worship, prayer, study, acts of mercy & service) as definite expectations of their members.  Jesus isn’t something to dabble in!  Those who aren’t willing to make the commitment are welcome to be a part of the ministry…just not as full members.   The expectation is that eventually they will step up to the plate.  Dedication to the faith is central.  I’ve seen some of these churches grow significantly, though some people feel pushed away for not being ‘good enough’ to be a part of things.  Do seemingly arbitrary rules trump grace in the desire for a ‘pure’ worshipping community.

Like my cross country team, some churches place very low demands on their members.  They emphasize the Jesus who came to welcome all people.  Come as you are because grace abounds.  Once a part of the ministry folks are encouraged to grow in faith, but welcoming trumps all.  Too many expectations may drive people away so they are kept to a minimum.  The Christian life is offered as an invitation, not a demand.  I’ve seen some of these churches grow significantly, especially among those who have been pushed away from other communities of faith, but do they minimize the importance of Jesus in our lives in the desire to welcome all?

Our culture likes to push at the extremes (and argue about them), but might there be middle ground here?  How can a community of faith truly welcome all as Jesus did…yet also expect that people of faith have some accountability in their lives?  Let’s not fall off the cliff on either end!

Feeling Unwelcome

A number of years ago, while I served as pastor in Benson, IL, I received a call that Jeannie, a member of the congregation had been taken to the hospital and placed in ICU.  As was my custom I headed to Peoria to have a word of prayer with her, but when I got to the ICU a large sign hung on the door, “No admittance…emergency in process.”  Obviously something serious had happened on the unit and they didn’t want visitors getting in the way.  I stood there for a bit, trying to figure out what to do.  I had driven for 45 minutes to get to the hospital so I figured I’d wait it out and get my chance to see Jeannie.  As I stood there killing time, a nurse stepped through the door and noticed my clergy collar and suit (yes, I do wear them on occasion!).  “Reverend, what are you standing out here for?”  I pointed to the sign and asked how long it would be before I could go pray with Jeannie.  She turned around and opened the door, “This sign doesn’t apply to you.  You’re welcome on this unit any time.  We need people like you.”

We pastors often receive this kind of welcome.  The title before my name (and the shirt that I rarely wear) opens many doors.  I’m invited into more homes than most people.  I often have the opportunity to join people for lunch at work.  People go out of their way to introduce me at social functions. Pastors are public figures who get welcomed in many ways.

There are times, though, when being a pastor becomes a barrier.  People assume that I must be ‘some religious weirdo’ and they don’t know what to do with me.  One of the places I’ve felt this the most keenly is at wedding rehearsal dinners.  Over the nearly sixteen years of my ministry I have performed many, many weddings for couples that I didn’t know all that well.  Following the rehearsal I often join the family for a night of celebration prior to the wedding day.  What happens is that I end up in a room of people that I barely know.  I may know the couple getting married or their parents, but this is their special night.  Family and friends abound.  The pastor is not in that inner circle.  When I take my assigned seat I find myself sitting by people who only know me as ‘the odd pastor they got stuck sitting by.’  People are well meaning…they intend to be welcoming and inviting, but the reality is that they came to the rehearsal dinner to have a fun night with their family and friends…not to sit by this guy they don’t know.   What do you talk to a pastor about anyway??  People often seem guilty to have a drink in their hand (apparently not noticing the beer in front of me).   It’s awkward all around.  I am often glad to bring Shannon along because at least then I have someone to talk to.  I can feel like I am crashing someone else’s party.  I don’t quite fit in.

When we don’t feel welcomed somewhere, we often won’t return.  It’s a very uncomfortable feeling that we want to avoid at all costs.

Every church that I’ve ever been a part of talked about being friendly and welcoming.  People would never feel uncomfortable like this at OUR church, would they? 

Believe it or not, they do.  Folks walk into a church building for the first time and feel out of place.  They likely don’t know people.  They’re not sure where to go.  They don’t know the routines.  Clusters of people gather around, laughing and joking.  Everyone else seems to know each other.  A designated ‘greeter’ may hand out a bulletin or something, but that’s about the only interaction.  They find a place in the worship space, not sure if they are taking someone’s seat or not.  Within the first two minutes they have made the decision that this is not a welcoming place.   It’s a very uncomfortable feeling that we they to avoid at all costs. 

After the service, during the hospitality time, they sit at tables by themselves, again watching people find friends and catch up on things.  They feel like a pastor at a wedding rehearsal dinner…there is a party going on but they are not a part of it.

When a conscious effort is not made to welcome folks, they quietly slip away.  While a few will stand up and fight to get included in ‘the group,’ many more will just give up, thinking, “If you don’t want me, I’m not going to bother.”

Last Sunday I received word that there have been families who quit coming to Peace because they did not feel welcomed.  Perception is reality…if people don’t feel welcomed, we can talk until we’re blue in the face about how nice we are as a community of faith, but in the end it rings hollow. 

This is a wake-up call for this ministry.  This WILL change!

This Sunday, come and find someone you don’t know.  Introduce yourself.  Say hello.  Learn about who they are.  You may realize that this person has been a part of Peace for a decade.  If so, you just got to know someone new in your life.  You may find someone visiting for the first time.  If so, the love of Jesus flows through you to welcome them into the community. 

If people don’t feel like they belong they will not return.  While we may feel uncomfortable talking to people we don’t know well, do we let that excuse drive people away? 

This isn’t a wedding rehearsal, intended only for family and friends.  We don’t have a ‘No admittance’ sign at our doors.  This is a public place of worship where God invites all people.  We claim that this is important to us.  It’s time to act like it.