Letter to God - Struggling to Find Meaning in Pete Stellpflug's Death

Dear God,

When I stopped by the bank yesterday I received the terrible news that Pete Stellpflug died yesterday morning when his tractor rolled on top of him.  I still have a hard time believing it.  I worked with Pete on the Eyota Days Committee and marveled at his passion and energy for the City of Eyota.  Pete served as the banker for Shannon’s business and always made sure she was taken care of.  Every time I’d stop into the bank I’d feel compelled to poke my head into Pete’s office to give him grief.  He had a great sense of humor. 

Lord, how can things like this happen?  How can a good, caring, man of faith have his life so quickly snuffed out?  He had family and friends that loved him and depended on him.  It doesn’t seem right. 

Are YOU the kind of God who causes these tragedies?  As people try to find meaning in this mess it can be easy to lay the blame at YOUR feet. 

·         “Everything happens for a reason” – Really?? What reason could possibly justify such pain?

·         “It was part of God’s plan” – Seriously?? YOU planned to cause a family to experience this kind of grief?? 

·         “God needed Pete in heaven” – I think his family needed him down here!

·         “God needed another flower in God’s garden” – I’d think that YOU could grow your garden without causing so much pain!

God, if any of these remarks are true then YOU caused Pete’s death, which makes YOU into a God who enjoys seeing people suffer.   That doesn’t sound like YOU at all!  YOU are the God who came to earth in Jesus to DEFEAT suffering and death...not to CAUSE it! 

But God, if YOU didn’t cause this tragedy, does that mean that YOU didn’t have enough power to prevent it?   If YOU don’t have the power to stop a tractor from rolling over then YOU can’t be trusted to have power over greater things.  YOU reveal YOURSELF in scripture as the God who created all things…who works in all things…who conquers sin and death.  That’s a lot of power!  If the words of the Bible have ANY meaning for us at all, then we must reject any notion that YOU are powerless to act.

If YOU didn’t cause the tractor to tip over on Pete…and if YOU have power to prevent it but didn’t…then that must mean that you chose to allow it to happen.  We obviously live in a world where bad things occur.  Pete’s death hits close to home, but we’re not the only ones suffering today.  Tragedies like this happen every day.   We live in a world of pain and death.  My feeble attempts to find explanations or deep meaning leave me empty. 

God, I’ll be honest.  I don’t understand how YOU could allow such suffering in the world!  The one thing that I DO know is that YOU came in Jesus to conquer sin and death forever.  I am simply left with this promise for Pete…and for me:

Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? ⁴ We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life. ⁵ If we have been united with him in a death like his, we will certainly also be united with him in a resurrection like his. (Romans 6:3-5)

I cling to this promise with my entire being!

Your Child,

Pastor Pete

Genesis 3:19

By the sweat of your brow

   you will eat your food

until you return to the ground,

   since from it you were taken;

for dust you are

   and to dust you will return.”

You are dust.   On December 13, 1944 God took some dust, formed it into a small baby and breathed life into my mother, Edith Ann Dodd.  By the time of her birth her father, 2^nd Lt. Charles Dodd, had already returned to the dust, killed in the WWII fighting in southern France.   And to dust you shall return.

You are dust.   On April 2, 1971 God took some dust, formed it into a small baby, and breathed life into me.  Twenty two years ago, on March 15, 1979, my mom returned to the dust, succumbing to lupus.  And to dust you shall return.

You are dust.   On June 11, 1998, God took some dust, formed it into a small baby, and breathed life into my son Ben.  The day will come when I join my grandfather and mother and return to the dust.  And to dust you shall return.

Ash Wednesday provides a striking reminder of the realities of this world.  We receive the ashes on our foreheads with the words, “You are dust, and to dust you shall return.”  These words can seem a bit scary to many people because they remind us of our mortality.  They keep us from thinking too highly of ourselves.  We came from dust.  We will return to dust.  There’s not a lot of glory in that.

You are dust, and to dust you shall return.  My earliest memories of faith come from that horrible day in 1979 as I sat with my family at my mother’s grave.  As a 2^nd grader I didn’t understand much of what was happening, yet in the midst of the darkness of that hour I heard words of hope.  Death might come and bring pain to this world (and it does) but Jesus has already conquered death.  I knew that day that mother would live, not on this earth, but in God’s Kingdom.  That experience shaped my life.

You are dust, and to dust you shall return.  I’ve experienced a lot of death in my nearly 40 years.  I’ve sat at the graves of three grandfathers and one grandmother.  As a pastor I have presided over funerals of the elderly and the very young (including one seven year old boy killed in a grain bin accident).  I don’t ever pretend that death doesn’t bring pain.  It surely does.  I’ve known many tears.  In the midst of that pain we proclaim that death is not the end.  Through Jesus’ death and resurrection death is just another part of the journey of faith.   Those who have died in Christ know a reality that we can only dream of.

You are dust, and to dust you shall return.  I’m OK with that!  While I definitely enjoy the life that God has given me, I can look forward to life with God forever.    God promises something much better that this daily experience.  We will live in the presence of God.  Nothing can compare to that!